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Joke of the Day

"MAMA Be quiet Freddie JUST KILLED A MAN As your lawyer I- PUT A GUN AGAINST HIS HEAD Just- PULLED THE TRIGGER- We plead guilty, Your Honor"

"A mechanical engineer asks to his crush... Do have a manhole I could enter?"

"Why is studying statistics hard to do in Afghanistan? because of the tally-ban"

"Would I miss my leg or my arm more? (me, lying in bed, deciding which to put outside the blanket for the monster under the bed to rip off)"

"What do you call a turlte that flies? a shellocopter. damn homies"

"What do you call a Mexican with a vasectomy? A dry Martinez."

"Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 20 seconds."

"I don't understand banks. Why do they attach chains to their pens? If I am trusting you with my money, you should trust me with your pens."

"Old people always poke me at weddings and say ""you're next."" I do the same thing to them at funerals"

"It's kind of obvious why Western countries don't eat cat Can you imagine how costly it must be to kill the same animal 9 times before you can eat it?"