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Joke of the Day

"The downside of robotic limb replacements is that they cost an arm and a leg The upside of robotic limb replacements is that they cost an arm and a leg"

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"How do you think the unthinkable? Run your thip into an ithberg"
"If a magnifying glass ever got into a fight.... ...It would be easily intimidated."
"My girlfriend said she wanted to be treated like a princess... So I hired paparazzi to follow her and she died in a car accident."
"What did the physicist say to the suicidal guy on the bridge? Don't do it! You have potential!"
"Ancient Aliens"
"If I had to rate racist jokes... I would rate black jokes a 3/5 and arab jokes a 9/11"
"How much does Jesus love you? Thiiiiiiis much. (Must be said while arms are raised out to side)"
"Did you hear what happened to the fly on the toilet seat? He got pissed off."
"If I were Obama, I'd totally lead with ""My fellow Americans, the situation looks popeless."" #SOTU"
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