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Joke of the Day

"9 out of 10 people agree that it's weird to stand on top of the toilet and ask them survey questions over the stall wall."

"I lost a Scrabble game today when my opponent played the word ""Clitoris"". I was amazed at how fast he found it."

"2 guys walk into a gay bar... and the bartender asks one of them, ""Why the long face?"" The guy answers, ""My eyes are up here."""

"if your best friend Jack was stuck on of a horse, would you help your friend Jack off a horse?"

"British people must really like Leia in the new Star Wars movie. Stiff upper lip!"

"The only thing worse than a male chauvinistic pig is a woman that won't do as she is told."

"What I learned from watching Star Trek: Nothing. I've never watched Star Trek. I am popular with friends. We don't do that."

"What is the deadliest bear? Seriously... I don't know the punchline to this, help me out."

"They say 'No news is good news,' but I think it just means I have a lazy paperboy."

"*cape flaps in the wind* Me: Are you ready to defend freedom for another day, Captain K? Mom: Quit blocking the fan and put the cat down."