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Joke of the Day
"Friends: ""I need a new profile picture."" Me: ""I need a new face."""
Next Joke
"ME: why am I always anxious? maybe watching TV will help- NEWS: IF THE HURRICANE DOESN'T KILL YOU, CLOWNS WILL"
"What kind of pickles does Miley Cyrus like in her relish? twerkins"
"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. But, I still can't figure out how they got in there."
"So Yellow and Green are dating. Why does Yellow hate Red? Because Red Blue Green."
"What does the jewish kid do on the swing? Pisses off the sniper."
"Reddit is to socialising ...what a gloryhole is to love."
"I wish there was some sort of idiom to describe how easily I just took that lollipop from that infant."
"Snake: *hissssssssss* Feminist snake: \*herrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr\*"
"Have you guys seen the movie called ""Constipation""? No? That's cuz it hasn't come out yet..."