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Joke of the Day

"Be sure that you go straight home after school I can't I live just round the corner !"

"How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? Put it into a microwave until it's bill withers."

"Everyone at the office is going crazy because I faxed someone a hot dog"

"[runs up to a group of people] ME: ZACK ATTACK GUY: lol is your name zack or [thousands of bros crest a nearby hill] ME: [whispering] RUN"

"What caused Captain Morgan's shipwreck? He was on the rocks."

"Hey girl, are you a grape? Because you are raisin my dick"

"What language do lesbians speak? Gaelic."

"Jesus and his apostles go to a restaurant... ""Table for 26, please,"" Jesus tells the hostess. ""But there are only 13 of you."" ""Yeah, but we're all going to sit on one side of the table."""

"A friend told me he was karyophil And i was like ""Are you fucking nuts?"""

"A UDP packet walks into a I would tell you another UDP joke but you might not get it."