14790

Joke of the Day

"I want to get a dog just so I can name it Stain That way when I take it to the park, and if it runs off, I can yell ""come Stain!"""

"A skeleton walks into a bar... And tells the bartender, ""I'll have a beer, and a mop."""

"Why is golf named ""golf""? Because all the other fore letter words were taken (Thanks to /u/bonerfar... this now makes sense...)"

"What do you call a search engine that sings Christmas songs? Michael google."

"What limitations does braille have? Can it represent everything that we read using the alphabet? Very limited fonts."

"What's the difference between you and mallard with a cold? One's a sick dick, and I can't remember how it ends, but your mother is a whore. -SNL reruns-"

"Happy Passive Aggressive day! Don't worry, I didn't want you to get me anything anyway. No, it's fine. Don't worry about it."

"What's the difference between a priest and a pimple? At least the pimple waits until you are 14 before it cums on your face."

"What does an old woman's qwiffy taste life? Depends ."

"Why did the condom go flying through the air? He was pissed off. (It took me an embarrassing amount of time to get this one.)"