147667
Joke of the Day
"How do you eat soup with chop sticks? Slowly."
Next Joke
"I know so much about cars All I need to see is their headlights and I can tell exactly which way they're going."
"A scientific joke Q: Why are Curium, Helium, and Barium the medical elements? A: Because if you can't Curium or Helium them, you Barium!"
"""How did the blind girl explain her pregnancy?"" She said she didn't see him coming"
"The less you give a damn, the happier you will be."
"I don't know why everyone looks so stressed. I tweet and drive all the time. Oh...must be the beer."
"I long for a slightly simpler time when old people with fifteen types of produce were too intimidated to use the self checkout"
"*ding* This is your captain speaking. We... Is this what my voice sounds like? Nobody told me! Haha, wow, weird. We're out of fuel."
"Two deer walk out of a gay bar... One deer turns to the other and say, ""man, I can't believe I blew 30 bucks in there!"""
"Do you know what's cooler than those fake chains around your license plate? Everything. Every single thing in the world."