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Joke of the Day

"What do people mean when they say kids are 'experimenting' with sex? Getting it on in a lab coat? Is that how you get a test tube baby?"

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"Who is the most cowardly knight in all the land? Sir Ender"
"What's the difference between a very old shaggy Yeti and a dead bee? One's a seedy beast and the other's a deceased bee."
"How do you make a tissue dance ? Put a little boogie in it !"
"If my kid vanished on a plane like in that Jodie Foster movie I'd spend maybe 2-3 hrs enjoying the legroom & quiet before I started looking."
"Your turtle puns tortoise family apart"
"Your face... ...looks like it caught on fire and somebody tried to put it out with a hammer."
"*feels the music* Music: ""ew. no."""
"(Ok don't let her know ur Jesus) Girl: Meet my dad *they shake hands* *Dad stands up from wheelchair* Dad: It's a miracle! Jesus: *facepalm*"
"What do you call a spelling mistake on a map? A topographical error."