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Joke of the Day

"Don't know whether to be disturbed or enchanted that the word sesquipedalian is onomatopoetic"

"What's the best part about dating a black girl? Not having to wait for her downstairs with her father."

"Tell 'em how it 'tis, not how it 'twas: Edition 1. It used to be the joke was ""If ya lick 'er, it's quicker"" Now it's: if ya drug 'er, ya fug 'er."

"What do the World Trade Center and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's too offensive to talk about."

"How do astronomers organize a party? They planet."

"Hey feminists, 70% of a penny for your thoughts?"

"""Can we stop for a second? I forgot everyone's names again."" - me, if I was a character on Game of Thrones"

"A magic tractor drives down a road... and turns into a field."

"I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model."

"4: How do you spell no? Me: Sound it out. What makes the na na na na na na na na na sound? 4: Batman? (Spelling is hard)"