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Joke of the Day

"The problem with the world today is that intelligent people are too smart to have children."

"amazing how folks can pinpoint the subtle floral undertones in a glass of wine while i'm like ""yo, is there mustard on this grilled cheese?"""

"What's a 69er got in common with the mafia ? One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit."

"5 dicks So I was at a bar and couldn't help but notice the guy next to me was pissing with 5 dicks. I was like ""Krakens! How do those even fit in your pants?"" He replied ""They fit like a glove."""

"Every time you get a haircut, you're essentially returning your last haircut and exchanging it for the exact same thing"

"Cells multiply by dividing."

"Like a good neighbor State Farm and I haven't ever spoken."

"Someone told me I have no sense of humor I don't get it"

"A gay guy punched me the other day for no reason. Why? Because gay guys are fucking assholes. I'll show myself out."

"What's Richard Nixon's favorite game? I spy."