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Joke of the Day

"Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face"

"[Mr. Robot] I may be late... ...and, for sure, Edward Alderson is late, but Christian's later"

"You are 15 years old you should feel butterflies in your stomach not a baby kicking"

"Want to hear a quality joke about knives? On second thought, I can't tell it. It's too edgy"

"What did the Jewish pedophile say to the kid? Would you like to buy some candy?"

"What happened to the two zombies who went on a date? They had a *Necro*mantic** time."

"Went for a 4 mile run this morning. Now everything hurts... even my eyelashes."

"Biology Joke Biology teacher: Can anyone name a disease? Student: I can sir. Teacher: Well done. Whose next?"

"Funniest Joke Ever... What do you call a crazy introvert?..............A walnut. *crickets* Thank you, thank you."

"How can I draw attention to the fact this skirt is too long? AHEM!"