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Joke of the Day

"My dad made this joke after finding out he needed surgery for potential rectal cancer. Well at least no one can call me a complete asshole anymore!"

"Jobs that do not exist anymore Steve"

"Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin... It might taste the same but that shit just ain't right."

"Q: What do you call an Inibrian who has been buried for 1000 years? A: Peat!!!"

"What do you call an African man with alot of problems? A Zulu Worry-er > I actually made this up just now while chilling with some of my black friends. They loved it."

"Is Santa Clause real? Because the zero's on my bank statement are."

"The Magician The magician said he would disappear on the count of three. He counted uno...dos...but he was gone without a tres."

"""Why don't Mr. and Mrs. Smokey the Bear have any children?"" ""I give up, why?"" ""Because every time Mrs. Bear gets hot Mr. Bear throws dirt on her and beats her with a shovel."""

"There is a Hispanic train conductor going around committing horrible crimes.. No one knows why, but it's clear he has a loco motive."

"Conversation between two accountants at a cocktail party: "".......and ninthly..."""