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Joke of the Day

"Today my dad told me that he quit his car vacuuming job after the first day. He said it was a sucky job"

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"I recently purchased a teddy bear for 10 And named it Mohammed, then sold it for 20. My question is.....have I made a Prophet?"
"My circle of trust is a meatball"
"What kind of computer can't sing? A Dell"
"I always envisioned Hermione as a burly, middle-aged Italian fellow, so imagine my surprise when the films revealed her to be a little girl."
"A boat carrying red paint, and a boat carrying blue paint, both crash into each other. The crew are now marooned."
"What do you call a skinny, Islamic cow? A moo-slim."
"What's the difference between a pig and a musician? A pig won't stay up all night to fuck a musician"
"What looks like half a cat ? The other half !"
"Save your little napkin, bartender. I don't plan on having this drink long enough to set it down."
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