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Joke of the Day

"Reception Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? The wedding sucked! But, the reception was AWESOME!"

"There are two reasons I don't give money to the homeless 1. They use it for drugs and alcohol. 2. I need it for drugs and alcohol."

"What's the difference between the 2016 Rio Olympics and the 2016 US presedential race? The Olympic competitors are qualified."

"A speech should be like a woman's skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to keep it interesting!"

"Why was Michelangelo banned from bukakke porn? Cuz he could never paint dat mouth right"

"What did the Chinese man give his daughter? A clothes hanger."

"What's worse than 9/11? 311 Credit goes to my friend Max."

"Why did Leonardo Take forever to laugh at my Oscars joke? Cause he just got it!"

"Whats the difference between a Russian garbanzo bean and a Russian chickpea? A president has never been blackmailed into treason over a video of him paying to have a Russian garbanzo bean on his face."

"Why didn't Edward get on the plane? Cause it was snowed-in."