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Joke of the Day

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Cyclops Barbie ...one eye right in the middle of her forehead; Cyclops Ken sold separately"

"What would people call Ryan Lochte if he went to jail? Ryan Locht-up"

"Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring? The referee said he wanted a clean fight. :D"

"People are like, ""Jess, can you give me some advice?"" & I'm like, ""K, don't get kidnapped."""

"What did the guy in China say to the Chinese couple who finally got approved to adopt? Con-grab-ur-asians!!"

"Free Tip: If a prostitute has nice teeth and carries a purse, she's a cop."

"One time I walked in on my brother, masturbating. We locked eyes for what felt like forever. Then he yelled, ""Why the hell are you masturbating!?"""

"*rubs lamp* Genie: ""you get three wishes"" Me: ""I wish I wasn't so alone"" Genie: ""k wow I'm like right here"""

"Why girls don't have willys Little brother came into the kitchen and declared ""mom, now I know why girls don't have willys! They fall off, and I found yours under your pillow"""

"What does a boy get every month, but a girl doesn't. A paycheck"