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Joke of the Day

"I just saw a guy wearing uggs get arrested. Not sure what for, but I'm hoping it was because he was wearing uggs"

"Why should you never run in front of a bus? You will get tired."

"I bought my mom a fridge for her birthday present You should have seen her face light up when she opened it!"

"What does the sun drink out of? Sunglasses."

"[NSFW] What's the difference between a woman and a Fridge? A Fridge doesn't fart when you take the meat out."

"What does a gay horse eat? Haaaaayaaaaay!"

"What did one piece of butter say to the other? Aaayyy mah butter from another udder"

"The difference between dates and prunes? You don't get laid after prunes (Courtesy of my date last night after I asked her this question seriously)"

"I know a guy who refuses to use anything except paper money. But he says he's trying to change."

"Why is a miscarriage like a shitty pizza? They're both cold upon delivery."