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Joke of the Day

"I went for a job interview today... The interviewer said to me, What would you say your greatest weakness is? I said, I think Id have to say my listening skills are my greatest strength."

"Why are trombones the sexiest instruments in the orchestra? Because they can be played in seven positions and you have to oil the slide."

"What's so good about living in Switzerland? Not sure but the flag's a big plus."

"What do you call a small Mexican? A paragraph."

"How many passive aggressive people does it take to change a light bulb? Don't bother, I'll do it myself."

"""Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."" The priest replied, ""I know. I saw your tweet!"""

"Hey, strippers named ""Elantra"". It's too late to grow some self respect but at least read Car and Driver before picking a name."

"Guy walks up to a Canadian and says ""Who was that lady I saw you with last night?"" The Canadian says ""That was my wife."""

"Why are Mormons more like Muslims than they are like Christians? Christians are not-for-prophet organizations."

"Q: What do you do with a green monster? A: Wait until it ripens."