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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an ISIS training camp and an elementary school? I don't know, I just fly the drone."

"Job interviewer: ""Why do you want to join the Secret Service?"" Me: ""It's a secret."" Job interviewer: ""You got the job."""

"I've opened a restaurant called 'Karma'... There's no menu, you just get what you deserve."

"My friend David lost his ID the other day... Now we just call him Dav."

"ME: ""I'll have a rum & coke."" HIM: ""I can't serve you."" ME: ""Because I'm too drunk?"" HIM: ""No. 'cause this is a hardware store."""

"If boys had uteruses... If boys had uteruses they would be called Duderuses. (from Bobs Burgers)"

"Are you African? [NSFW] Because you are a frican bitch. Zing~!"

"Doctor told me I only have 6 months to live, maybe 12 if I get enough likes on Facebook."

"Working in a mirror factory is something I can totally see myself doing."

"Why do I support extreme racist political parties? Because their aims are white up my street"