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Joke of the Day

"How do you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tit a lot"

"cops should have two guns to get rid of crime faster . cops should be dual wielding by 2016"

"A group of Germans walk into a BAR... after 20 rounds there are no survivors."

"Me: tries to sleep Brain: M: B: M: B: M: B: if one synchronized swimmer drowns do the others have to drown too?"

"/r/jokes pretends that it has more than 1000x as many subscribers as it actually has... as a joke! http://imgur.com/wYy6m"

"Where did the team get there uniforms? New Jersey"

"Alright let's hear them. Your best and favorite knock knock jokes. Me: I have a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Person: Knock knock Me: Who's there"

"What do you call a boy-band composed of stoners? No Direction."

"I'm Homy... I bet 99% of you pervs misread that."

"Why is cowgirl my girlfriend's favorite position? Because she says I'm only good at fucking up."