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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy with the perfectly average facial features. I hear it was a mean look."

"I got a new job breaking up suicidal couples. I'm not very good at it, two of them already tied the knot."

"I just Googled 'Nicolas Cage jokes' and it showed me a list of every film he's been in. Well played, Google."

"How many billionaires does it take to create a superhero? Three: two to die and one to never get over it."

"My nickname at work is ""HR wants to see you"""

"elephant: i'm thirsty, how do i drink mother nature: inhale water & squirt it from ur nose directly into ur mouth elephant: what the hell"

"Whats the difference between Jam and Marmalade? (NSFW) Whats the difference between Jam and Marmalade? You cant marmalade your cock up your girlfriends ass"

"What did the dog use to make his kite? Flypaper."

"Another friend of mine is a very successful businessman. He started with five thousand pounds - now he owes fifty-five million."

"While we are on the offensive jokes, here's mine:""What's better than fucking a 13 year old boy against a barbwire fence?"" ""Nothing"""