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Joke of the Day

"popcorn, or as cerebral smart minds such as myself refer to it 'popped corn', is the number #1 food of watching things"

"Have a box of tissues on hand when you watch ""Ghosts of Girlfriends Past"" on DVD, guys. And, yes, I mean for the copious weeping. Jerks."

"What music do they play in a mexican bathroom? Earth wind and fire"

"What's black and does not work? Decaf Coffee"

"GOVERNMENT VS. MAFIA Q: What's the difference between the government and the Mafia? A: One of them is organized."

"[restaurant] ME: Do you have updog? WAITER: [sighs] No sir M: Ok, is this gluten free? W: No you have to pay for it M: Damn you're good"

"Another shitty joke Don't mistake me for a fool! I'm just a half."

"Mirrors don't lie. Lucky for you, they can't laugh either."

"What did the prostitutes left leg say to the other leg? Between you and me, we can make a lot of money!"

"Why did the blonde get excited after finishing her puzzle in 6 months? The box said 2-4 years!"