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Joke of the Day

"Now the UK is out of the EU we can ban pre-shredded cheese. Make Britain grate again."

"Why does the doctor spank the baby after birth? To knock the dicks off the dumb ones."

"My new truck is older than my girlfriend... Its ok though a 12 year old truck still has a lot if life left."

"The Parachuteless Dave Michael: Dave is so brave! He jumped out of a plane without a parachute! John: Ohh is it true? Where did you get the news? Michael: From his funeral."

"Door-to-door Christian guy: Have you heard the greatest story ever told? Me: Definitely. I love Star Wars."

"I gave my friend a gluestick instead of chapstick last weekend and she's still not talking to me."

"What is Peyton Manning's favorite Counting Crows song? Omaha"

"What do you call a cow with three legs? Tri-tip. What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef. What do you call a cow with one leg? Steak. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef."

"I don't see the issue with microcephaly. Personally, I love a little head."

"WRITER: A drifter & a rich lady fall in love WALT DISNEY: Can they be dogs? WR: A woman steals a couple's baby WD: Can the baby be 101 dogs?"