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Joke of the Day

"Remember when the Backstreet Boys sang 'Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely' and then we all showed them for the rest of their lives?"

"[undercover FBI agent who's had me under surveillance for weeks decides to blow his cover] do you ever stop eating?"

"It's not that I accept the Terms and Conditions. It's just that I would rather not spend the rest of my life reading them."

"Robert Downey Jr. went on a trip to the Virgin Islands Now it's just called "" The Islands."""

"what did the leper say to the prostitute? You can keep the tip."

"If you ever go skydiving and your parachute doesn't open don't worry You have the rest of your life to fix it"

"Do you know Andy Griffith's wife? OP's mom"

"Adventures Of Pedo-Sherlock How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes? -Elementary, my dear Watson."

"If I could, I would avoid every conversation by making that beeping truck sound while slowly backing away from people as they approach me."

"A conversation between two strangers in a diner... Man #1: You know, without the mustache you'd look just like my first wife. Man #2: I don't have a mustache! Man #1: She did."