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Joke of the Day

"""To hell with it, thats good enough."" - every person after theyve ever tried to iron a shirt. Ever."

"a guy goes to see a therapist And tell him he keeps having 2 reacurring dreams, one night I'm a wigwam, next time a teepee. Doctor says thats easy, you're just two tents."

"The best part about Puppy Bowl? Since all the puppies are already neutered, there's no worry about deflated balls giving one team an advantage..."

"I got asked out by 12 girls out of the women's bathroom"

"i need to get something off my chest *takes off my nipple*"

"The Fortune Teller, came true! I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money. Last night I fucked a girl called Penny - is that spooky or what?"

"What's the difference between my Grandma and the FBI? My Grandma can unlock an iphone."

"We should let prisoners take their own mug shots...I shall call it ""The cellfie"""

"I think we should hear adeles boyfriends songs before we pick sides."

"Why was the Router released early from prison? It had connections."