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Joke of the Day

"Serious top linked post on /r/science made me laugh: ""Giant methane storms on Uranus"" Original link: http://phys.org/news/2015-03-giant-methane-storms-uranus.html"

"I told you ill be there in 5 minutes. Stop calling me every half an hour."

"Two old woman were sitting on a park bench A naked man with a fully erect penis walked past. One of the ladies had a heart attack, the other had a stroke."

"[homeless guy walks up to me at the park] ""what are you doing inside my house?"""

"idiot blind person What is the difference between someone who is so dumb he doesn't know how to open his eyes and the sun. The sun is bright enough to see!"

"How did the Hipster burn his tongue? He ate pizza before it was cool"

"Did u hear about the leper poker game? everyone threw their hands in"

"What do Monica Lewinsky and Bill Clinton have in common? They blew a seal."

"When my wife starts to sing.... When my wife starts to sing I always go out and do some garden work so our neighbors can see there's no domestic violence going on."

"How did the butcher cure cancer? With salt."