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Joke of the Day

"Sex is like a gas station..!! Sometime you get full service... Sometimes you gotta ask for service and sometimes you have to be happy with self service.!"

"After giving up crack, I've been sniffing brake fluid for months. It's okay - I can stop anytime I want."

"do you know what 6.9 is? It's a period ruining a beautiful thing."

"I bet short people get really excited when they accidentally hit their head on things."

"To me, ""drink responsibly"" means don't spill it."

"Everyone have a Good Friday! ...I'll show myself out"

"As I unwrapped the condom I thought to myself... ""This is a really weird birthday present, mum."""

"[NSFW] How did the Redneck mother know that her daughter was having her period? Grandpa's dick tasted funny."

"Mother: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?...Son: I don't know. The dentist kept it"

"George Carlin:""Why do laxatives always say 'Works gently, overnight'?"" ""What if I want something that works violently right now?"""