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Joke of the Day

"SON: The car's manual suggests not to turn the stereo up all the way. DAD: Guess you could say- SON: NO DON'T- DAD: -that's sound advice."

"I'm sick and tired of those who say Hillary has no great accomplishments.... I would say staying out of prison for the crimes she committed in the last four decades is a great accomplishment."

"The sign said 'Free Range Chickens'. So, I took some."

"How may tickles does it take to make an Octopus laugh? Tentacles!"

"Nice beard bro looks like you just ate a bunch of lollipops then made out with your cat"

"What's the difference between chopped beef and pea soup? Everyone can chop beef, but no one can pee soup!"

"I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium hooked up last night. I was like OMg."

"What's the temperature inside a tauntaun? Luke warm."

"hi and welcome to hidden chair club. please find your seat"

"Fear does not exist in this dojo, does it? NO, SENSEI! Gluten sensitivity does not exist in this dojo,does it? Put your hand down Aiyden"