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Joke of the Day

"Let's hear your best ""my penis is so big"" jokes My dick is so big that at birth, instead of spanking me, the doctor smashed me with a bottle of champagne"

"If you ever feel like a complete moron never forget that I managed to text my wife today that she forgot her mobile at home. You're welcome."

"How do you say ""bra"" in German? Stopsemfromfloppin"

"""Sacre gray!"" - Colorblind French guy"

"What's Rectangle, red and bad for your teeth? A Brick!"

"Why are Muslims so violent? Because I slam."

"God said He loves me? That's awkward. Tell Him I want to see other people."

"In case you're thinking about having a kid, my daughter just threw a tantrum because I wouldn't let her watch me poop."

"Advice tip for people: 1 stick hand in glue 2 stick hand in feather 3 now you are like bird. Impress your friend."

"Donald Trump's chief speechwriter is a random deck from Cards Against Humanity."