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Joke of the Day

"I'm not saying the wife's a bit rough but you can see all the blokes on the beach dressing her with their eyes."

"Considering how badly Asians drive, I got to thinking. Maybe Pearl Harbor was an accident."

"Fact: If you ever blow me a kiss, I'm catching it and sticking it down my pants."

"What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rhino? The Nobel Prize in Genetics."

"mom: who's your background? me: my boyfriend mom: can i meet him? me: not before i do mom: what? me: what?"

"Theres this one word I always stumble on when I try to remember it.... oh yeah, the word is forget."

"I'm at an awkward weight I'm fat enough to not look good with my shirt off, but not fat enough for it to become part of my charm. I'm caught between a rock and a lard place."

"Why are gay guys able to float? Because they're flamboyant."

"The UK Government has decided to make LSD legal as a drug for weight loss It makes sense if you think about it. It's kinda hard to get to the fridge when there's a dragon guarding it..."

"Why do black people cry during sex? Because of the mace."