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Joke of the Day
"My blood type is also my life motto: B Positive"
Next Joke
"If CON is the opposite of PRO is congress the opposite of progress?"
"Why do SCUBA divers fall backwards out of the boat? Because if they fell forward they would land in the boat!"
"What's the saddest computer you can buy? A Dell"
"DUMBLEDORE: Say hello to our new Defense Against The Dark Arts teacher, Professor Totally-Not-Working-For-Voldemort. SNAPE: Dude, seriously?"
"Parents w/ 1st kid: *Peels grape & slices it into 84 tiny pieces. Parents w/ 4th kid: *Gives kid knife & fork to cut their own steak."
"Please stop praying for my grandpa u are making him too strong. He broke out of the hospital & cops say their tasers don't work on him :("
"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? No-one: feminists don't change anything."
"I spent ages trying to cross a busy road. Some passer-by said, ""There's a zebra crossing fifty yards up the road."" I thought, ""I hope he's having better luck than me."""
"What should you call a bald teddy ? Fred bear !"