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Joke of the Day

"It wasn't much fun having a broken neck, but now I can look back and laugh."

"I took a laxative and smoked some weed. You know just for shits and giggles."

"What doesn't kill you makes you vengeful."

"So, my Doctor told me I needed to stop masturbating... I asked ""Why?"" and she replied, ""because I'm trying to examine you!"""

"[clown interview] Why become a professional clown? me: [picturing getting hit in the face with cream pies every day] um I like kids"

"Anyone know how long you can keep a chicken in the freezer? Because I put one in last night and it was dead this morning."

"Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was ,""Bach, Bach, Bach"""

"Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? ... Incase he got a hole in one. HEHE one of my favs. Whats your fav joke?"

"The only thing a woman wants jumping out of a cake is another cake."

"What did the watch say when the necklace, earrings, purse and ring killed the shoes? I won't be an accessory to this."