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Joke of the Day

"Chinese girl for her number I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, ""Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"" I said, ""Wow!"" Then her friend said, ""She means 666-3629."

"Sometimes my eye-rolls are the most exercise I get all day."

"What's a Londoner's favorite seafood? King's Crustacean."

"I'm so bad at riding my unicycle It's impossible to get a handle on it..."

"If I was a detective, my main suspect would always be the person who returns to the scene of the crime AND is eating a Klondike bar."

"Just took one of those ""Which Movie Character Are You?"" quizzes and found out I'm the plastic bag from American Beauty."

"My dentist is hysterical:""just let me put the tip in. It won't hurt. I have drugs to numb the pain"" Ha. should go see him professionally!"

"What's the difference between the Amish and a Ferrari? About 568 horses."

"I cracked two jokes earlier about Malaysian Airways. The first got no response and the second crashed and burned."

"What did Barack say to Michele when he asked her to marry him? I don't wanna be Obama self."