142933
Joke of the Day
"""My bad"" and ""I'm sorry"" mean the same thing Unless you're at a funeral."
Next Joke
"What did one hat say to another? You stay here, I'll go on a head!"
"My Blonde neighbor says me and my friends suck at basketball. I asked her why and she said, ""Because double teaming is against the rules"""
"Did you hear about the businessman who is so rich he has two swimming pools one of which is always empty? It's for people who can't swim!"
"What does a sailor use to clean his clothes? Tide"
"Did you hear the one about the Jewish carpenter? I heard he nailed it!"
"Yo mama so fat, her patronis is a cake."
"Why was the detective excited when he found a thimble sized crown? He was looking for Finger Prince. (Say it out loud if you don't get it.)"
"There are some horrible bastards about I heard a cat crying outside my door and I saw 4 blokes in Chelsea shirts playing football with it I was just about to phone the RSPCA when the cat went 1- 0 up"
"*buying teacher's gifts* 7: Mrs. J said she hates candles. Me: {recalling mountain of homework every night} Pumpkin Spice Candle it is then!"