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Joke of the Day

"Only use ""extra virgin"" to describe olive oil that doesn't even think about fucking."

"How many Mexicans does it take to build a... Oh, wait, they're done."

"Just watching that movie where Julia Roberts has a lot of teeth."

"[talking to mcdonalds cashier] which burger has the most acai berry vitamins and superfood antioxidants?"

"If Goku used his kamehameha at Jesus Then Jesus is doomed, because even if he blocks the kamehameha, it would spill through the holes in his hands."

"We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control."

"What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and Scotsman? The Rolling Stones say ""Hey, you, get off of my cloud."" A Scotsman says ""Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe."""

"My friend had party the other night and didn't invite me, only midgets. He said it was just a little get together."

"What do you call an Atheist at a Christian fancy dress party? A cross-dresser."

"Why did the boy look at each and every one of the animal crackers? Because his mother told him not to eat them if the ""seal"" was broken. Credits to my school principal"