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Joke of the Day

"How are Americans and poles similar? Running into one could really ruin your day."

"What turns on mathematicians Big quantitties."

"What do you call a man with a toe on his knee? Tony"

"My husband just went 69 mph in a 50 zone just so he could point at the speedometer and wink at me. 15 years and going strong."

"Florida is about to release millions of genetically modified mosquitoes. I hope when they bite you they make you drive better."

"How do u make a Pirate angry? Take the P out of him."

"Why did the archaeologist ask a diamond out to dinner? Because of his enthusiasm for Carbon-Dating."

"Jesus knock tentatively on God's door, enters, and God says..... Now lets go through this one more time....What exactly did you tell them again?"

"Why did the farmer feed his cows money? He wanted rich milk."

"Was driving today and I saw some chick texting and driving... Pissed me off so much I threw my beer at her."