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Joke of the Day

"Is there such a thing as spontaneous feline combustion? Anyway, baking soda and vinegar are terrible for cats."

"What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment!!!!"

"Did you know you can raise your energy levels by holding sodium in one hand and a AA in the other? Worst thing that will happen is you'll be charged with, A salt and battery."

"1 in 2 in 3 in 4 in 5 doctors are babushka dolls."

"Budweiser is a lot like sex on the beach; It's fucking close to water."

"Facebook is basically just you having a conversation with yourself hoping that someone else will join in."

"So much rosemary. So little thyme."

"If someday we all go to prison for downloading music, I just really hope they segregate us by genre."

"I like my beef how I like my misbehaving teenagers... Grounded."

"For Follow Friday I recommend Saturday."