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Joke of the Day

"Why don't neckbeards hit on people with heart conditions? Because people with heart conditions take beta-blockers."

"What do you call a nun sleep walking? A roamin' Catholic"

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? (gag noise) **Note: This joke is better when read aloud.**"

"If I was a stripper my name would be medusa Because I'll make you rock hard ;)"

"""Lincoln"" is a terrible movie The main character dies at the end."

"Blackhawks What is that player's name on the hawks that starts with Johnny. I think I know. Oduya?"

"It saddens me that the closest my car will ever get to being a Transformer is when I fold in the side mirrors."

"Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted."

"With all of this technology, you would think we would have exercise equipment that simulated scenes from Jurassic Park to actually motivate my ass to run."

"if you told a kid that their parents died or that their balloon flew away, you'd get the same reaction."