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Joke of the Day

"Follow your dreams, do what you love, and you'll never work a day in your life! Because they're not hiring in that field."

"Why Can't Atheists Solve Exponential Equations? Because they don't believe in higher powers."

"If you had bad legs, why wouldn't you want to be a college professor? Because you never sitty down!"

"Starbucks really isn't that expensive when compared to what Victoria's Secret charges per cup"

"Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine? When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week."

"What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy? Oh no not snake and pygmy pie again!"

"Two men walks into a bar Knock, knock"

"What do you call an alcohol free Japanese city? Nadasaki"

"I'm going to put my grandmother on speed dial. I'll call it Instagram."

"Two dogs are going on a walk down the street They walk past a few parking meters and one dog says to the other, ""Hey, check it out! Pay toilets!"""