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Joke of the Day
"Went to Big Lots with a $100 gift certificate and they just handed me the keys to the store."
Next Joke
"how did the female half of the interracial couple open up the discussion about her swinging fantasy? Cracker wanna poly?"
"Teacher: Where is the English Channel? Student: I don't know, my tv doesn't pick it up"
"I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added ""they fall right off"""
"If used correctly, Twitter can be used as an antidepressant. Just don't take it as a suppository."
"Never using online dating again. Last guy said he lived in a gated community. Prison. He meant prison."
"Hi, I'm Captain Morgan and this is my uptight brother, J.P."
"What do Mexicans cut their pizzas with? Little Caesars"
"Wife: ""You talk like some poorly written science fiction novel. I'm leaving you."" Me: ""I swear by the 12 moons of Bumtar I can change!"""
"Doctor: What's your zodiac sign? Patient: Cancer Doctor: What a fucking coincidence!"