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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a basement full of liberals? A whine cellar."

"What's Glenn's favorite fast food? Popeyes!"

"Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear ? Because he liked sole music !"

"Jared of Subway fame's house was raided for investigation of child porn charges..... I found it surprising, as Jared seems to prefer footlongs."

"So me and my ex never worked out I was a cancer she was a cunt.. Anything but a Virgo and her Pisces smelt like a Taurus"

"The Windows Update reminder to restart your computer is like a little kid. You tell it that you'll restart later, so it goes away, then it pops up again in two minutes and says ""Ok, it's later!""."

"Q: Why shouldn't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she'll let it go!"

"Helluva guy John is a hellava guy. Type of guy who goes out on a Friday night, gets a couple of blow jobs, comes back and gives his buddy one."

"What's the difference between me and Jimmy Kimmel? I can make it to the end of a Jimmy Kimmel joke without laughing."

"Did you hear about the score of the football match between Egypt and Ethiopia? Egypt 8 - Ethiopia didn't...."