141310

Joke of the Day

"5th grade teacher: ""You have more wrong answers than your whole class combined. I have never seen one person make so many mistakes."" Student: ""Well... not *one* person. My dad helped me too."""

"I raise the bar when it comes to lowering standards."

"Fred: let's settle this once and for all! *fred rips my face away revealing bloody skull* Velma: he wasn't wearing a mask! Fred: I know."

"My mind has been wandering so long, we're pretty much in a long-distance relationship."

"Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales? He wanted to see how much the milky weighed!"

"Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A: Because the chicken wasn't invented yet."

"the year is 2086 and pizzas are delivering young men to your house"

"Click here for 17 facts about suicide methods..... #8 will blow your mind!"

"What do you call that part of the pharmacy where they keep the condoms, birth-control pills, etc.? The Contrasection."

"Next Battlefield map set in Nepal. It's made using groundbreaking technology."