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Joke of the Day

"Thinking of having kids? Practice getting small children ready to play in the snow by wrestling a pair of gloves onto an angry octopus."

"I was raped by mimes They did unspeakable things to me"

"What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas? I dont know, hes still trying to kick it open."

"How do you say goodbye to two people in Spanish? Adidos!"

"if i could rearrange the alphabet i'd put ""u"" at the beginning and ""i"" at the end. i want a divorce karen"

"You know the times have changed... When Portugal leaves Brazil without taking any Gold."

"What's the difference between a joke and hundred of penises Seriously I can't take this joke anymore"

"So a seal walks into a bar.., Get it? No? Me neither."

"Why wasn't Cinderella good at sports? Because her coach was a pumpkin"

"I hate when people ask me what I see myself doing in 5 years...... I don't have 2020 vision"