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Joke of the Day

"Don't date a man expecting to change him. At the end of the day he'll still be a man, and you'll have wasted your black candles and a goat."

"This drunk guy in the mirror thinks he can beat me in a dance off but I totally embarrassed him in front of the whole women's bathroom."

"Recent studies have shown that 67% of women have used vibrators The other 33% have brand new ones"

"What do you call it when you cover your penis in postage stamps? Junk mail. (Credit to one if my FB friends)"

"I've always pictured myself taking selfies."

"There are two types of people in the world Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data..."

"Yo mamas ass is so fat She dont wear DENIM she wears DAMN!"

"I'm just like every other man... I do my taxes one leg at a time!"

"Modi/Nawaz Sharif Nawaz Sharif to Modi: ""Congratualations on penetrating into Mars. Whats your next target?"" Modi: Uranus."

"It's not often that one gets the opportunity to speak about someone intelligent, respected and admired. Unfortunately tonight I have to talk about (NAME)."