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Joke of the Day

"What did the match box say to the match? You're fired!"

Next Joke
 
"The odds of an asteroid hitting Earth are the same as one bullet hitting another bullet in a duel. Dinosaurs: We'll take those odds!"
"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the moron's house. *knock knock* ^^Whose ^^there? *the chicken...*"
"What's the difference between a redwood and a dead baby? A redwood won't fit in a wood chipper."
"Another International Ninja Day went completely unnoticed."
"My boss asked me which Game of Thrones house he'd best be placed in... I told him House Lannister because it only takes one hand to go fuck yourself."
"Superman: I'm my own worst enemy. Lex Luthor: oh. That's nice. I'm literally standing right here."
"What's the difference between a chick with a dick and a guy with tits? Empty testicals."
"""Sorry we're late. We had to stop so I could pee."" ""For two hours?!"" ""Yeah. It came out really slow."""
"9/11 Jokes aren't funny... But the other 2 are."