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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the beaver who went to the bar but forgot his wallet because he'd just shape-shifted from another water mammal? He says to the bartender ""I must've left it in my otter pants."""

Next Joke
 
"Luckily, children are much easier to keep alive than house plants."
"What do women in the Middle East and Millennials have in common? If they go to college, they'll probably get stoned."
"Why did the pedophile cross the road? He found out he was actually 991 feet from the playground."
"Girl are you the Iraq invasion because this was a mistake"
"Whenever a stranger asks our baby's name, I always say he hasn't told us yet."
"What happens on Santa's lap......stays on Santa's lap."
"hey it's me, the girl who just googled ""chemistry alphabet"" when i meant ""periodic table"""
"My girlfriend broke up with me for my obsession with touching pasta. I'm feeling cannelloni right now."
"The start of a child porno Little girl: Uncle, how are babies made? Uncle: Take your clothes off, I'll show you."