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Joke of the Day

"There was a new machine at the gym... After using it for 30 minutes, I felt sick. Maybe I bought too many chocolate bars..."

"How do you get rid of a Reddit admin? Chooter"

"Asia and his father are playing a board game. Asia's father takes his turn. He looks at Asia and says, ""Europe, Asia."""

"What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATHE!!!"

"What do you call it when someone leaves at the first sign of a hurricane? A premature evacuation."

"I knew you would come crawling back to me. Shut up and give me back the wheelchair."

"If your Prius was a transformer his name would be Fagatron"

"What's the hardest thing to do when you go rollerblading? Telling your parents that you're gay."

"Ate too much salad today so I'm going on an Oreos cleanse tomorrow."

"50 Shades of Spalding Gray 7 years of decay and the East River."