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Joke of the Day

"If someone starts talking to you, easily get out of the conversation by nodding while climbing the nearest tree."

"Doctors to Patients The patient says, ""Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea."" The doctor says, ""Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink."""

"Raising children takes a village, preferably one with many vineyards."

"GIRL: would you like to go out for dinner sometime? ME:*nervously looks around* MY MUM: *appearing from nearby bush* he only eats lunchables"

"I would pay 5$ to see my girlfriend naked on the street I don't have a girlfriend, 5$ would be a good bargain"

"What's the difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Michael Phelps CAN finish a race!"

"What do your mother and a marathon have in common? They are both doable as long as you don't mind following a bunch of black guys."

"Which chord is essential to every Christian song? Gsus"

"There was once a conservative redditor"

"Just got home and found all the doors and windows wide open and everything gone... What kind of sick person would do this to my Advent calendar?"