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Joke of the Day

"I just got married today It's unreal. I can still remember the the exact moment when every woman in the world became instantly more attractive."

"I don't understand why men are so worried about erectile dysfunction. I mean, it can't be that hard."

"Offensive Joke (Orlando) The only straight thing in Orlando are the bullets"

"What do eagles and moles have in common? They both fly, except for the mole..."

"Husband Bear: Honey! I'm home! Wife Bear: For God's sake, would you at LEAST say hello before demanding dinner?"

"My mom and I donated 15 boxes of old books to Goodwill, and in every 100th book I left a note with an urgent spy message."

"Yesterday I took LSD and I wrestled with a grass snake for three hours. On a side note, our garden hose is completely wrecked."

"*texting with girls* Her: I <3 you Me:[throws phone in disgust but picks it up and texts back angrily] you're less than 3"

"TIFU by eating my boss' sandwich and getting fired. Oops. Wrong sub."

"I have been taking notes So if you are missing notes, I probably have them"