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Joke of the Day

"So this lady says: ""Would both of you guys do me at the same time?... ...come on, I double dog dare you."""

"Why did the stop sign get an STD? Because it had a 4-way."

"How many livers do people have? I want to make sure I have a backup before I put this thing on Ebay."

"The year is 2246. Disease and hunger have been eradicated. The terraforming of Mars is complete. The symbol for Save is still a floppy disk."

"Jealously is something you're good at when you suck at everything else."

"Why you never mess with imported ants? Because they are **important**."

"What do you call a German think tank? An answer panzer!"

"My wife with a hearing aid died RIP headphone users"

"What kind of bird lays electric eggs ? A battery hen !"

"Blind people should not skydive. It scares the crap out of their dogs."