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Joke of the Day

"I just really hate it when people start assuming things.nnnJust like my boss he assumes that I'm working just because I came to work today."

"My friend said to me, what rhymes with orange I said no, it certainly does not"

"Hacked again! Sometimes I wish I never grew up on 12,345,678th Street with a dog named Password."

"if anyone tels u ""evryday is a gift, thats why its caled the present"" just say ""evryday begins in sadness, thats why its caled the mourning"""

"Dad asks his kids what the third planet from the sun is called? Kids: - Earth! Dad: - Yeah, but it has another name. Kids: - Oh, dad. We don't know! Tell us! Dad: - Exactly! [drops mic]"

"""Update Adobe or we'll kill you""-flash mob"

"Which film star is always jumping around the forest? John Treevaulter."

"Each of my 4 children has made me a better parent. So I figure I only need 34 more kids to be a pretty decent guy."

"I wouldn't say I hate my dad... But I can't deny he's a real motherfucker."

"Fantasy Football Why won't fantasy football let me pick up Aaron Hernandez? He'd be killing on my team!"